Friday, December 12, 2008

First diet failure

I guess it was bound to happen. As diet failures go, this was small enough to likely seem ridiculous, but I am determined to follow the rules and I did not.

So yesterday, the condo maintenance people were coming in to make sure the ventilation ducts were clean. Good. Except I hate being home when they come in. I feel awkward about strange men roaming my place, I'm never sure where I should be while they're here (especially when there are duct-related things in both bathrooms, living room, and bedroom), and I hate having to make small talk with them when I'm thinking about a book.

To avoid all this, I spent the day out of the house. Went to the gym, did some Christmas shopping, had a (diet-appropriate) lunch, and then went to Starbucks. At this time of year, Starbucks has the mint brownies I adore. Sure enough, they were there.

And I didn't buy one! I got a small drink, at a sugar level I felt was reasonable, and was proud of myself for sticking to the plan.

Then the (evil, evil) Starbucks employee came around with a tray of brownie samples. Seriously, maybe an inch long by half an inch long. Hardly a brownie at all. Except it was one, and I should not have taken and eaten it.

Fortunately, a) I enjoyed it, b) it did not drive me to buy one, and c) I did not let myself use this little failure as an excuse to eat all the sweet stuff I could find for the rest of the day. But nonetheless, this brownie broke the rules. Therefore, there is a big ugly red day on my calendar.

I thought about pretending it was okay. I tried to talk myself into it not mattering since it was so small. But it does matter. I made myself a promise and I broke it. So I'm admitting it. And I feel better about that than I ever would have felt about a full month of 'perfect performance' when I knew it hadn't really happened.

Hiding from yourself is the worst kind of hiding, I think.


Fran Caldwell said...

You are just too hard on yourself.

For a diet to work, it must be do-able, enjoyable. You should incorporate the little pleasures into your day, as a reward for being a good girl. A brownie this size would barely be 100 calories.

Jennifer said...

I agree with Fran! A brownie the size of a strawberry is a treat that is surely compatible with any diet (except maybe stage 1 Atkins, and that's not healthy or reasonable). If you consider that cheating, you're doing a hell of a job!

Anonymous said...

I agree with jennifer. ou need hugs! (((Heather)))

Lauria said...

Giving into a craving every once in a while is healthy. Is avoiding all "bad" foods that cause you to stres out and really break your diet.

Maybe you could work into you plan that you're allowed to have a little something "bad" for you as long as it's a specific size and you only have it once a week or biweekly. Then you won't ruin your perfect record and you won't feel guilty.

Good luck, I think that if that's the biggest mis-step, then you're doing great!

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

Those mini mint brownies are sooo good and addictive; no one could resist that!

(last post deleted because of extreme spelling difficulties...)

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